My mom has been gone one year already today and the pain seems just as keen and the loss just as sharp as it was a year ago. We spent many of our last years estranged, but my love and caring for her never stopped during that time. I have prayed for her every day since I first learned how to pray as a child.
The memories have been even more strong this past year since she has been gone. I find myself occasionally smiling at a memory of a time when she was too naive or simplified an event way too much. One time she told us “we better hurry before it closed”, to get to a shop that was open 24 hours a day.
I remember how my mom passed on her love of special occasions and holidays and always made them good even when there was little money and everything had to be created by hand. When I was in grade school, mom made me a Little Bo Peep costume almost entirely of crepe paper. It was really very creative and beautiful.
When my son and daughter-in-law had their wedding reception there were many special memories that day, but one I recall best was the way my mother beamed when I asked if she wanted to dance with me. Her smile was like the sun just came out. A joy and innocence was part of that smile that was rarely seen as she got older and medical problems increased.
I remember the huge platters full of Christmas cookies with too many varieties to count that she shared with everyone who visited. They all got a plate full to take home. Her super high chocolate cake that no-one could resist and her country fried steak that almost melted in your mouth were just two of the special foods she prepared.
Mom and I spent many afternoons having tea and her giving me practical and loving advice. We sat in super clean rooms and her kitchen cabinet boasted cups and saucers standing at attention in a specific order. She still could put you at ease even in that environment
My father used to laugh at mom wrapping everything in plastic bags that was put away for even a short time stating he believes she had stock in those plastic companies. She was very methodical in the way she did things and thought things should be done in certain ways and very slow and carefully.
She cared about everyone and was at more family death beds than anyone else I know. She nursed those who were in ill health till she could not even help herself very much. Took in those who needed a place to recuperate or just recharge.
She was a good person and is and always will be sorely missed.